Trying to Write again

“There is my fear
of no words of
falling without words
over and over..”
-Michael Ondaatje, White Dwarfs

This is for people who fall,
who trip over their own dangling
shoe laces,
over other people’s feet.

This is my fear
of no sound in the house
at two am. Of missing the breathing
of my mother because she isn’t there.

My fear of no words
of falling
without words
into sleep without breathing
my fear of
missing the bus because I slept
the extra ten minutes.

This is my fear of wearing glasses,
of being in an elevator with broken cables
of living ’till I die
my fear of
misspelling a word on the blackboard
with the whole class watching.